I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize