Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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