): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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