Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize