Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Randomize
