the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
