Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize