So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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