WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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