It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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