Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
