dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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