I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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