susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
