thus making me awesome and them whores
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
He did a backflip because drugs
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