Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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