I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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