True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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