hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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