Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
And the cops told us we were all naked.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
