Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
i used baking grease as lip gloss
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
two words...techno handjob
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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