FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
