look no pants
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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