white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
