dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
