THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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