Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Randomize
