Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
