hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
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