its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I enjoy the company of your penis
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
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