I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
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