I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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