Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
