the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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