The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
he shaved USA in his pubs
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize