what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
they call him Oral-B. enough said
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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