Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
