I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
What a fucking waste of an outfit
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Enjoy the penises
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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