You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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