How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
