sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
