too bad you live with your parents still
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize