I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize