Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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