I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Randomize