he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
