she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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