I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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