i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize