return my video game
Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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