can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
