Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize