That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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